Sent by Claudia

From Poynter Online:

Posted, April 23, 2003
Rummy Needs A Throw-Down

By Dr. Ink (more by author)





Dear Readers:

One of the oldest tricks in the book of corrupt cops is to carry a "throw-down." That's the name for a loose weapon used to justify a police shooting. The bad guy makes a threatening move, the cops shoot to kill and then check the body to find a gun. If the supposed weapon turns out to be, say, a cell phone, the cops take a spare gun and throw it down.

As the machinery of war in Iraq grinds down to a lower gear, it has become clear what Donald Rumsfeld needs: A Throw-Down of Mass Destruction.

Dr. Ink has a fantasy in which he picks up his newspaper to read this story:

Indisputable evidence of Iraq's possession of weapons of mass destruction was discovered Tuesday in a tunnel outside of Baghdad. Allied Forces found dozens of barrels of toxic material marked with skulls and crossbones. A large banner carried the following message in Arabic and English: "Here they are! Weapons of Mass Destruction!"

Taped to one of the barrels was a hand-written message signed by Saddam Hussein himself:

My loyal followers,

Please be careful. This is the real stuff. My Weapons of Mass Destruction. If you ever have any reason to mass destroy our enemies, foreign or domestic, you can use the stuff in these barrels. It really works! I used it against the Kurds and against the Iranians, so I, Saddam Hussein, not one of my many look-alikes that you see on TV, can vouch for this stuff. This is the stuff we’ve been hiding from the U.N. and Hans Blix. By the way, here’s a joke:

Q. How many weapons inspectors does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. What lightbulb?

Ha. Ha. Ha. I am one funny dictator. OK, that's all for now. And remember, the American dogs did not plant these Weapons of Mass Destruction here. They are MY Weapons of Mass Destruction.

Your leader,
Saddam Hussein

I hope we can scrape mold off bread and save it. With Bush in the White
House, bread mold is likely to be the only pencillin we can afford. --
Claudia D. Dikinis, April 24, 2003

". . . Democrats . . . fear - with good reason - that President Bush will be
empowered by this war victory, that he and Karl Rove will use that power to
drive through a radical conservative agenda that Democrats fear is erasing
separations between church and state, depriving government of the tax funds
it needs to maintain decent social and educational programs, and despoiling
the environment. Sure, Democrats argue, we did right in Iraq, but if it will
only lead to more wrong at home, how good can you feel?" -- Thomas Friedman,
New York Times